Close Encounter

Of the squirrelly kind! Yup..it's been quite some time since a squirrell has graced us with its presence but today one did! *big smile* I was in the kitchen getting things together to eat and was in the fridge. I noticed a flicker in the light on the pavement in the courtyard. It took me a moment to see the little guy on top of the fence but I'll be damned if there wasn't a really cute little squirrel. I think he was maybe eating something or cleaning his paws. I look to see where Shanni is at and she's laying belly down on the ground swishing her tail back and forth. She wasn't about to take her beady little eyes off of him. I expected at any minute to see her go bounding across the courtyard to try and nab him. To my great surprise she just continued to lay there swishing her tail. He was up on the fence for a good five minutes, before the little cutie disappeared over the side of the fence.

So, that seems to be have been the big excitement of the day for us. LOL Is that sad? I don't think so. I prefer a nice, quite, uneventful life with no drama and the only run in I want is with wildlife, just not too close! LOLOL I had my share and more of drama long ago. It was definitely enough to last me a lifetime. If you had asked me back then if I wanted the life I had now, I think I may have said, hell no! You nuts?! So much to do, parties to attend, worlds to conquer and Harley's to ride! *smiles* I do loooove my Harley's. *sighs a little sigh* Hearing one go by, or seeing one...still makes my heart go pitty-pat. I'm sure that to actually be on one at this point would hurt like bloody hell but I can still look.

We've had to do something I never thought we'd end up doing again. I applied for food stamps a couple of days ago. Hubby working a part-time job isn't going to get us far. He makes well below half of what he was making at his full-time job. The bills and rent are coming due again and we don't have not one penny to pay them with. The electric is now officially overdue though. LOL We're hoping to get help with it. I'm really,really hoping to get enough to get through the month on so what money he is making can go for bills and my meds.

This is one of those times I soooo hate being like this, unable to work. We both feel equally helpless, stressed and angry but at the same time I feel guilty and upset. Hubs told me that I have nothing to feel guilty about. Rationally, I know that's true. I didn't want this crap, I didn't get hurt on purpose. It was my bosses fault for not fixing that damn handle and I also blame my relief cook for not showing up on time, again! The not so rational part of me feels so much. Sometimes it's hard to put names to it all. It's a little like being in the middle of tornado, being battered on all sides, taking my breath away.

I've thought about ways of trying to make money from home but so far, after almost 6 years, have found nothing. I could make stuff to sell but that takes money to buy the things I need and I don't have any money to buy supplies! All those work at home things are scams. I don't qualify for ssd and have to make at or below $946 a month to qualify for ssi. Even part-time hubs makes about $1,200 a month right now. *shakes head* It really makes my head hurt!

Ok..guess I'll end it here for the night. I've been working on this for over an hour now. LOL Later gater!